Which is my homeland?

I have spent 16 years of my life in the state of Bihar, right from my birth. Needless to say, it stirs up my soul whenever there's a question raised on the integrity of the people of Bihar, in general. I can, anyday vouch for the fact that I have met some of the most ferociously intelligent and genetically honest people from the state. My father has spent around 35 years working in the state. We were rather respected there, as Bengalis have historically had evidences of good grey matter and 'dowry' is absent atleast in more areas of West Bengal than it is in Bihar. My mother, being a teacher, still recalls some of the brightest brains who she had as her students and are now doctors & engineers in different parts of the country. Few of the top rankers in exams like IIT-JEE, CBSE-PMT, IAS entrance etc are inevitably from Bihar.

I wouldn't deny that there is lawlessnes, corruption and ignorance in many parts of Bihar but all of us know, a lot of it is the political melodrama that foists such misfortune in the state. Such that so many people with brilliant results are questioned when they produce their certificates.

And now, they are being beaten up in Maharashtra just because the lower classes from Bihar toil hard to become taxi drivers, carpenters, sweepers, cobblers etc in cities like Mumbai, Kolkata and Delhi. 

I owe allegiance to the city of Mumbai as it has really taught me a way of life but the vibrance of the city lies in its myriad hues. The day it loses its cosmopolitan nature, I can bet, it will no longer be the same Mumbai.

I have spent 4 years in the Vidarbha region of Maharashtra and 85-90% of the population there heralded from sub-urban and urban areas of Maharashtra, never did they question the remaining 10% OMS (Outside Maharashtra students) for their entry or stay in Maharashtra. Rather they were happy to learn/know from people who they were alien to. Atmost, they would express sympathy for the fact that they could visit their hometowns on a long weekend and we couldn't, owing to the distance from our homes.

And here in Mumbai, a stranger woman in the local train (Marathi by birth but married to a Punjabi man) had the audacity to ask me when will I leave Mumbai! I was spellbound!!

Not that I would let this women cast a shadow on the nice memories I have because of helpful souls in the city but I just pondered for a while - Does she need to stay in Punjab or Maharashtra now?

I have stayed in Kolkata, West Bengal for around 2 years but the Bengali culture, per se, makes me feel close to home. However, the recent incident with Tatas not only hangs my head in shame, it feels like a huge personal loss. The city which was the breeding ground for most intellectuals in the country once upon a time has been asleep for a very long time now. And the ones who are still shining, have to head out of the state, out of their homes for opportunities that they could sustain and excel in. I do not quite understand the political nuances of what happened but all I know from the common people like me, is - It was a huge loss for Kolkata and for West Bengal!

Kolkata is unfortunately now known as the city of strikes! Intellect still remains genetically intact with an average Bengali and has been demonstrated through several examples but what is now lacking is a will to win!

The world is changing really fast and India continues to lose every day on account of these disturbances arising in different parts of the country, out of falsified emotions based on language, caste, religion.

Not that none of us knew this before but my curiosity to know how many of us (amongst the educated Indians) can really stand up and say, "India is my homeland" and feel it too while crossing boundaries of states within India...

The Virtual Us!

Nowadays, very often we talk about how safe/secure is Orkut or any other social networking website? How reliable are the profiles on a matrimony website?
Though the fear for the unknown in human minds is believable, but I really can't understand why these questions are asked? After all, the users of such websites are human beings and they would behave exactly the way they behave in their real worlds. A gentleman cannot dupe anybody online and a habitual liar can't spell out the eternal truth online. In 99 out of 100 cases, I have seen people behaving exactly the way they are both in the real and virtual worlds. If we need to be defensive on the road against a common but an unknown man on the road, we need to be so even online. If we do not feel shy to approach anyone on the road, then we do not need to be so online. The only difference is the visibility of the face, but I am sure most people are not the best of face readers in this world. And given the very low Internet penetration in our country, it's considerably easy to figure out the nature of people on these websites.
In this ever shrinking world, where having the right information is a key driver in both our personal and professional lives, it would be rather foolish to not use these mega powerful sources of information. After all, the world is made up of 'We, the people' and with them alone lies all the knowledge and wisdom.
Orkut is often seen in the news for posed to have been instrumental in murders or other negative acts, but we forget that we derrive a lot of information in all of these cases from the same source.
Also, how many people have bothered to check the really exciting, informative and helpful communities on Orkut? Atleast I don't know of any survey that has ever shown the number of benefactors from Orkut.
I have been on Orkut since November 2005 and have seen it grown from a very nascent form to a very evolved one. In all phases, I have seen bugs which have been fixed by Google in due course of time. I have always had a very genuine and honest but detailed profile which has helped the right kind of people approach me - both acquaintances and strangers. Not that I have added all acquaintances and not that I have liked all strangers. So, it's very much like real life. It has aided me through thick and thin. Whether it was sharing a few lines of poetry with someone, or solving professional queries. Incidentally, it has helped me get married as well! I have a reasonably large number of people on my network and atleast 5% of them would certainly be ones whom I have still not met. Nevertheless, I share a good relationship with all of them - exactly the way I make new friends in the real life. LinkedIn, the professional network is also doing wonders for me these days. I believe, it's about the mind match and not about the face! That's why it is said - A man is known by the company he keeps.
I cannot imagine a life without Google. For me, it's a religion - whether it be Orkut, Gmail, Google search, news, videos, igoogle, blogs and many others. I feel empowered every time I am online as, without dislocating myself, I get answers to most of my queries.
So, those who are still negative about the virtual world, please come aboard and explore! There's a lot in life that you don't know about, you'll see through this medium. It's like scuba diving - discovery never ends!

The Weather and Me!

Something that has invariably affected my state of mind and overall well-being is the weather and the climate, at large. For me, good and bad days come with a complete mental picture of the weather on the respective days. My levels of hunger, sleep, mood, lethargy are effectively regulated by the weather. So much so, that even if I am sitting in an air conditioned office the whole day, I, symptomatically behave/misbehave in direct proportions to the weather outside.

So, in effect, if I am irritable and have a 'not-feeling-nice' aura about myself, then it must be a hot and sultry day. I just cannot take humidity! Maybe because I was born on a chilling cold, winter night, my soul finds solace in winter. The summers are typically of two kinds in India. One is the very hot and dry one, and the other is moderately hot but a very sultry, sticky one! They can be equated to Delhi & Kolkata respectively. I can take the former much better than the latter. Humid places facilitate my clothes getting plastered to my body even after a bath! The worst days of my life are analogous to such a weather. In dry heat, if the scorching sun can be avoided, atleast inside my room, jaljeera and a water cooler brings respite!

Coming from Bokaro, which was more of the dry type, it was a pleasure to gulp down chaas/lime juice after cycling down on a hot summer afternoon, from school. Water is virtuos for me. & Any soul who offers cold water may live long and all his wishes be fulfilled. Also, a summer afternoon, wherein, the room has been cosily protected from the solitary rays, and I might have had a heavy carbohydrate lunch, a deep sleep is inevitable. There are hillarious stories in my life centred around these sleepy afternoons. When the sun descended after such an afternoon, and my mother would go out to water the plants in our garden, the aroma of what is typically known as "mitti ki khusboo" used to be mesmerising!! I really miss that in Mumbai :-( Metropolitan cities have no flavour of their own. They are all alike, according to me.

I pine to be at the bank of the river Ganga, as I did in Hooghly, during summer vacations. My grandparents stay there. The river breeze really takes away all maladies! It communicates volumes between people who are just silently sitting at the bank of Ganga.

Then, comes pouring down the blessings of the rain God! Indian economy, being agri-based, it's a blessing for the farmers, but for city dwellers it's hell multiplied by 5 times! In one such Monsoon, I was on a job hunt in Mumbai and in another, I marginally survived the floods. But Bokaro, which is located on the Chhotanagpur plateau, has differences in altitude in every road. So, the rain water flows down like a stream and it was fun peddling down through it and splashing off the water on some snob's car! ;-)

A good monsoon evening comes with coffee and pakoda and an afternoon comes with khichdi with butter/ghee in it. And, the fan of the 'goddess-of-sleep' that I am, the entire day from sunrise to midnight enforces that drowsiness in me and re-instills all faith in procrastination! Only that the dawn and mid-day look like, which misleads the signals sent to my nervous system - "It's time to wake up and go to work"/ "It's time to have lunch".

The autumns are usually nice - just like in Tagore's poetry! The Durga Pooja adds to the pleasure of the weather! Those who can smell the weather, recognise the change in colour of flowers & leaves, and can identify this season better. And since I am 'Rhituparna' (a leaf in every season), I can see it :-) (Except for in this ridiculous city - Mumbai! The phenomenon called 'The October heat' is disgusting! It's hotter than summer here in that month!)

Though I have never stayed in ice-cold places and am yet to feel the snow, but winters are indeed lovable! The flowers that bloom, the vegetables that grow in this season, the warmth of sunshine, the cosy clothes,all radiate positive energy unlike the constant stickiness in summers. In reminiscence, I cherish the memory of simple acts during schooldays - exhaling smoky air, cycling through heavy mist not knowing what's ahead, and warming the refill of the ball point pen in between palms to make it write! All good food, in my knowledge & taste, come only in this season. Since I am not very garment savvy, I like the fully clad look in cold, crisp winters. I have more fashionable sweaters/jackets than T-shirts :-) Unfortunately, winter is non-existent in Mumbai. In my first December here, I waited each day to feel the winter and slept in disappointment every night. The city, so renowned for its deadly monsoons has hardly felt winters. Incidentally, I got married in winter as well so it was added pleasure :-)
Falling into spring, I am reminded of practical exams, study leave for an exam that I will anyway not fare well in, or the disastrous onsalught (exam) itself. However, after a long spell of laziness in waking in the mornings, it starts feeling better. In school, post exams, I could smell the leaves of new books & notebooks along with the season, though, the content of those books never interested me ;-) In college, culmination of university exams meant a month of vacation at home. Also, 'Basant panchami' (Basant means spring), that coincides with Saraswati Puja, is a beautiful day. Bhog, orange/yellow/saffron colored clothes, books kept away for worship, fills happiness inside out of nothingness - one bright day out of the study room in that sad study leave period!
In the present corporate life, however, all these pleasures are more memories than experiences. I still pine to feel each of them till all my 5 senses are working! In the air conditioned offices, life has got too conditioned not to feel these zero penny but inexplicable wonders.

IIT/IIM syndrome...

Coming from Bokaro, I have been very close to the IIT/IIM aspiration of the country...to an extent that anybody who didn't get through was considered as being useless!
It has been a much discussed question - What makes these IIT or IIM graduates so ..., ..., ....? These attributes are both good and bad.
I have heard people saying that they are very snobbish, think too high of themselves, get too much of attention etc. Except for in the matrimony market, where I too feel they are over valued and their degrees should not be weighed against the respect of a woman; I believe, they deserve to be proud of what they are. The logic is simple. But to understand that, one needs to have sat through the IIT-JEE and the CAT.
I have taken both and therefore, I know that it's sheer intellectual masturbation that one goes through those hours of examination! Your vital cause of existence changes, it's a life changing experience which can put you inside or throw you outside one of those revered campuses. Once you have raised yourself to that level, you ought to be different and better be one! The world looks upto you, not without any reason. Once you join the majestic Indian Institute of Technology/Management, the bar is raised, so you further strive for excellence. And even if you are not the best on campus, life there takes you to a different level altogether. And then the common man cannot question - 'Why do they get paid so highly?'. Because in many cases, the common man will not have the intelligence to understand even that.
Even otherwise, if one bothers to read through some statistics of the enormous number of living beings in India who take these exams, and the amount of time & money that they spend in coaching themselves, you would realise that for most, this dream is larger than life. It's not mere education that happens at these campuses, your ability to live a good life gets shaped. I can confidently say so because I have been close to many such souls. For some, I thought it was madness, for others, it was brilliance! I have seen them withdraw from the rest of the world for more than 2 years sometimes, and the only thing that drives them there is their dream!

Though, many of them, with utter humility say that it's just one amongst others, I refuse to believe so... Professionally, they ought to stand apart by every measure and most of them, that I know, do.

Hence, it pains to see the ramifications of the government regulations in favour of the so-called lower castes. I don't know what to call it..but the country is certainly heading for a conscious suicide by doing so... If the gold is not pure and of good quality, polishing wouldn't ever help. Somebody who has never won a state level game, can't head for the Olympics, right?? If only I could do something more than protesting against it! I can only pray that those who enter those gates by virtue of caste and not of merit, may please realise that they are getting that seat by displacing many deserving candidates and hence they better work really hard towards delivering an equally sound future for the country.

I forgot to mention above that the Indian Institute of Science, Bangalore also stands in the same league of pride & prejudice and is internationally one of the best for science graduates who wish to pursue research.

Public Relations

As the name suggests, it is about "maintaining relationships with the publics" because "yeh public hai, sab jaanti hai!" and No one can really afford to let the public let their tongue loose. ;-)
I am a new entrant in this profession. I have been studying this subject since last 1 year and am about to complete the course. As I assume roles in a formal capacity in a PR agency, I thought I'll pen down few things that are on top of my mind.
Since the PR industry is still very nascent in India, there are lots of rumours, speculations, assessments, failures associated with it. It has often been defamed too and the most talked about thing in this business is the love-hate relationship that they have with journalists. I am, at this stage, not equipped enough to pass a judgement on the existing state of affairs. Nevertheless, I am confident enough to put down the way I feel PR should shape up as.

The story starts from one of the most debated questions - "Whether Media really shapes or represents public opinion? Whether it is always ethical and supports truth? Whether it is a benefactor of everyone who reads it?"
If these questions have a discrete and objective answer, only then many myths about the PR world can be dispelled.

The talking point is that PR involves mobilizing public opinion for a certain agenda, to create a buzz around objects/events/ brands/ organisations as advised by the client, sometimes to just tell 'My story' (the client's) and be heard in this overcrowded marketplace'. Media is merely a tool, but undoubtedly a very strong one and in many cases, the only one! How many of us can think of a morning without newspapers? Or an evening without television?
Exactly so, a certain person/organisation would like to reach you and tell their story through these media. To whom exactly do they want to say? How they would say it to you? What they would say? When they would say? Where they would say? - To address these questions, they have a corporate communications department who works in close co-ordination with a PR firm which specialises in this.
So, for all communication that goes wrong, the PR firm is normally held responsible as they are being paid only to do this right. The PR firms ought to maintain good relations with the media, with the client, with all stakeholders of the client (customers, employees, shareholders and others), and with peers in the industry. They must do this and the faster they get good at this, the easier their job becomes.
But what people fail to understand is, there is more to the job! They need to understand the client's business - in & out of it, know the client's personality, know exactly what's up on his mind all the time, know the industry that he operates in, know the place he's based out of, know the competitors as best as is achievable, know everyone else that matter to the client's life. Quite clearly, this is not easy to achieve and the lack of information and channelization of the same is where they stumble sometimes and are heavily criticised. And, the most important attribute of a human being - common sense! is a must-have skill for any PR professional.

Incomplete knowledge then prods the PR guys to in turn, pester the journalists with some prospective piece of news about their clients, which is often not of interest to them or something which is not newsworthy.
The disappointment in PR people furthur leads to disillusionment and they are prompted to cook up cock-and-bull stories, please the journalist in 'not-so-desired' ways, in order to sustain their businesses. They are hence defamed 'spin-doctors', and often bear the brunt of the client's or the journalist's bad moods.

In an ideal scenario, PR firms should be an important and authentic source of information/data/news for the journalists but I guess, we are yet to walk a few more miles before we get close to that utopian situation.

Everyone who comes to know my background, asks me in surprise as to why did I move from IT (a prosperous and a matured industry now in India) to PR (a nascent and less paying industry)! Obvious question, maybe!

Other than communications being my area of interest, I also felt the PR is the thing-to-be in the next decade! The number of players in every industry are increasing manifold, that is what they call as 'me-too' market. Advertising is extremely expensive and not everyone can afford being in the most seen places to make themselves visible. Secondly, not every advertisement leaves an impact on us, in fact very few do. Thirdly, there's an underlying assumption that since the company is talking about itself, they would hide their weaknesses/loopholes. Not that Advertisers would lose out completely, they too have come a long way in making or breaking opinion. Only that PR too is evolving and at a fast pace. But since invisible PR is best PR, the growth is also more felt than seen.

To put it more subtly, PR is basically third party endorsement of what someone is. When the media is found talking about something, in all our conscious minds, we believe it to be true and then coax the media if it is untrue, we never bother to verify the information. So, the PR guys ensure the visibility of truths about their clients in the media by letting them know it in various ways such as a press release, press conference etc.
Basically, PR makes or breaks opinion. A news appearing repeatedly for sometime in any of the media, gradually creeps into our subconscious minds and we tend to remember it. That's exactly what PR aims at achieving without throwing it at your face every now & then, and loading you with information when you don't want it.
We are 'ICONOCLASTS'. We are in the business of 'IMAGE/PERCEPTION MANAGEMENT'. We don't cause devastation, we only work towards the prosparity of all and sundry. The consumer (i.e. you and I) have now become intelligent enough not to fall for explicit marketing gimmicks. But what we still fall for what we believe. 'What we believe' is what PR intends to gradually influence.
I feel, PR enhances the whiter shades of life, it initiates a movement from 'Grey to White' or 'Black to White'. It should ideally present facts in a manner that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages at least to the people to whom the information matters. It is not about hiding truths or spinning stories. It is about telling a tale beautifully in light of facts and analyzes that exist. After all, there's nothing in this world which is impeccably flawless or is the ultimate truth. All depends on how we have fed our systems. So, there's no harm in accepting or at least listening to, if someone has a contrary opinion. PR never forces to change opinion, it only influences to... Accepting/rejecting the opinion is entirely the reader's/viewer's choice.

The larger role for PR professionals would be Communication consulting, an integral player in the spectrum of Mass Communications. We should and would consult people as to how to talk, write, express, emote for communicating what they want to. No one wants to be misunderstood or misconstrued! None of us what to mean things thatwe don't really mean. All of us wish what if we knew what's their on the other person's mind and act accordingly so that our slate is always clean. Doing this is what we specialise in! We are no Gods, we only work on the background facts (history/geography of a case) well enough to justify a truth that we want to say on our client's behalf. Just like lawyers play with logic and laws to determine the fate of wrong do-ers, we present to you truths in the colour that the person presented wants to be in. And believe me, this presentation is backed by a lot of knowledge and creativity. It takes both the left and the right brain to arrive at something which is favorable to somebody and not rude or offensive to anybody else. You might see a different picture of the person. No harm! We just say politely, "Think twice please!"

One of the most beautiful things in this world...

What do you think could it be? Love?..that's a cliched answer! But I am not talking about it. This is one thing that everyone needs, everyone hopefully has, in small or large measure, everyone pines for when there's lack of it. God must have created it in sync with our nervous system otherwise, the latter, which controls everything that we do, would have gone for a toss! One of the web definitions reads "a natural and periodic state of rest during which consciousness of the world is suspended". If you have now guessed it right, I am talking about "SLEEP". The very fact that I am writing a blog on it, indicates that I love this phenomenon/activity and specialise in it.

If you ever happen to meet anyone who knows me through school/college, he/she would tell/demonstrate to you my impeccable gestures while I slept in the class right beneath the nose of a professor. I have been told that when tried to awaken, I have fluttered my legs in dissonance and in pretence that I am listening :-). With no offence meant to the professor/lecturer/presenter, I really sleep well. I do not feel drowsy, I just sleep. For anyone who sees me doing it or is sitting next to me, it is a cause of utter embarassment. At that point in time, even if I am thrown out of the class, I would still sleep. While most of you would consider it as imprudent or daft behaviour, I would explain to you briefly what I go through while exibiting such behaviour. Due to my 'not-so-high' level of intelligence, it often happens that I do not follow what is being taught or maybe, my attention span is so low that I don't allow my nervous system anytime more than this span to absorb what's going on around me. My free, hence restless nervours system, then switches itself off (to save my metabolic energy for other vital causes ;-)). Hence, sleep is triggered by a complex group of hormones, and that respond to cues from the body itself and the environment. I pity and adore people at the same time, who can stay awake even when they are completely passive to the environment, I really am a failure in this regard. (But have no regrets!)

On other occassions, a drowsy summer afternoon, a cosy winter morning, a breezy monsoon all, my bed after a day's hard work, trigger in me the same set of hormones, the aftermath of which I have no control over. I don't consume alcohol, but those who do have told me that they are better off after drinking than me, just before getting sleep. If I try to resist, I get a very irritating sensation. It feels that a fistful of granular chilli powder has been rubbed on my retina and the sensation ceases only when when the eyelids meet each other. Whenever I have tried ensuring vision at such times, the onlookers get horrified as my eyes turn red and either look like a dracula or an alcoholic! ;-D (Please do not get scared, I am a very amicable human being otherwise :-)) Also, yawning is not an acoompaniment when I feel sleepy, I just fall asleeeeeeeep!..in a fraction of a second, the way people feel unconciousness. If I yawn, I am not sleepy, I might be generally bored or have nothing better to do.

There have been hillarious incidents, reasons for which all have been my irrestible sleep. Once, my roommate, on a day before the exam, tried throwing different baits to make me study on that scorching summer afternoon which had induced droopiness in everyone. After the whole day passed, I promised her that I would do justice to this exam during the night. While everyone had a nice laugh at my promise, she was still planning in assumption that I was lying. At around 4 am on that auspicious morning, she brutally kicked me out of the bed into the hostel corridoor (She's otherwise a very gentle human being) and yelled at me "Fail ho jaayogi!". I then, gathered myself, to turn a few pages of the book scripted in Greek & Latin, still retaining the greyness in vision.

Please do not ask me the results of that exam. I am blessed that I passed.

A few occassions where I slept unperturbed can't go unmentioned- In a crowded Mumbai local, while I was standing on my toes and people were resting on me from all sides. Someone whose shoulder i unintentionally used to rest my head on, shoved me off in disgust. Another time, I slept in the hall of fame/shame, the exam hall... Since my grey cells had got worked up enough yet couldn't render any solace to my teary answer sheet, they decided to reconcile with the goddess of sleep and drag my head down on the table.

I am sure that I will have enough stories even in future to keep updating this blog. Actually my pride and weakness for sleep is much higher than my ability to articulate it in writing, otherwise I would have offered you a more interesting read.

I request people who are insomniacs, to get treated as best as they can because I sincerely believe that they are missing out on a very beautiful feeling in this world. It's a state of being with oneself, completely oblivious to what's happening around. I love that state when I don't remember what happened before I fell asleep, that gives me a feeling that I would be held less accountable for anything that went wrong in this world during that time. No pain, no fear, no joy, no sorrow, no anger nothing...For me, that's the only way to attain 'nirvana'. ;-D If I am sleep derrived, I lose control over myself completely. I normally am not so fond of the dreamy/nightmarish sleep because that means my brain is still functioning and I love putting it to rest. Only then, I wake up with a very positive feeling, a sense of completeness, a sense of 'no loss'! I believe in quality over quantity sleep.

Very often, my sleeping habit has been misconstrued as misbehaviour, but I swear I would pay any money to get an 'anti-sleeping' pill or anything that helps me check that irritating sensation on my retina.

At the same time, I feel, it's better off to sleep when one is passive than pretend to be active. And I am sure the number of people who derrive pleasure out of this activity in this world are not any less than those who love eating, listening to music, reading etc as the number of members in the "SLEEP" community on Orkut are over 1,30,000.

So, take a chill pill whenever you are upset with life and have a wonderful sleep!

Trip to Rajasthan...November 2005

I'm back from a very eventful 10 day trip...Me & my sister flew from here to Delhi & my parents from Kolkata to Delhi at the same time..We met at the Delhi airport while we were still frenzily waiting for our luggages to be downloaded..! I can never forget the exhilarated call of my sister when she saw my father..'Babaaaaaaaaaaa!" aloud with all delight! The entire mob, comprising partly of genuinely sophisticated people & partly of well-made hypocrites gazed at us both in amusement & annoyance..
A night's stay at Delhi..Next day morning, a car booked with Delhi tourism was waiting outside our hotel & our dream voyage began..We drove to Pushkar & Ajmer, then to Udaipur (white City), Jaipur (pink city), Ranthambore (National park, particularly known for tigers), Bharatpur (bird sanctuary), Agra, Fatehpur Sikri,Mathura & back to Delhi...
For the first time in my life, I entered an Islamic place..the famous Dargah in Ajmer.. Though its a well built place but they did try their best to make us pray the Islamic way... My father had his hands folded in prayer, & the priest reprimanded asking him to keep his hands in 'dua' position... (Normally the priests at Hindu temples are also quite a pain in the neck!)
Pushkar is unique in having a Brahma temple (perhaps the only one in the world) & both of them are twin cities.
Udaipur is a beautiful city...lakes as big & transparent as my heart..:-), & white all around..People must be damn wealthy to be able to have every square inch built of marble, which is very cheap in the city...
Jaipur is only conceptually pink now... At both these cities, we visited quite a few palaces & forts...It appeared that the kings had lots of space & wealth to show off!!
The king of Jaipur, Raja Mansingh had succumbed to Mughal reign, so they were sort of rolling in gold, precious stones, best of clothes & accessories, weapons studded with semi-precious stones... & they too managed to marry a countless list of women, only one of whom would politically be the queen....

My Dad had a big hole in his pocket when me & my sister merrily shopped away to glory at Jaipur!
But Mughals were ...!! Akbar, the GRRRREAT emperor, had 830 women in his harem, with each of whom he would have one night stands!!!! The plight of women has been as evergreen as the earth itself!!! (Jodhabai enjoyed the rights of being his wife politically)
& Taj Mahal is famous only because Shah Jahan loved his wife a little more than the other kings..:-)
So they call it.."A Tribute to the grace of Indian Womanhood", "A Dream in Marble","An epitome of Loveliness" & the last but not the least.."A Replendent Immortal teardrop on the cheek of time"..:-)))
& That too, it was built after demolishing an upcoming Shiv mandir...
But the two most exciting events were the ride in an open vehicle across the national park in Ranthambore & watching wild animals in their secluded cocoons & birdwatching at Bharatpur.. We had a big & powerful binoculars & could see beauuuuutiful birds...ones with pink feathers, yellow beaks, blue & green bodies, crimson tail..it was fabulous!! I saw a kingfisher at an arm's distance & to catch a glimpse of its flight is a dream come true..Its like 'Coming up with flying colours'..:-)
The near view is exactly as in calendars, picture postcards & books..
There were starks, green pigeons, a variety of parrots, some Siberian birds, some domestic but rare birds...
The sanctuary is on 30 square km area & even after moving around for 6 hours, we could only strech to 7 kms..
Ohh!!! Eagle has ferociously cunning eyes..! My Binoculars made them look all the more scary..
On the whole, Rajasthan is very colourful & has good people..The moment we entered Agra, I could make out from the faces & looks that it is ..Uttar Pradesh!

We had a few interesting encounters with the myriad foriegn tourists. Its, we in India, who give more importance to our guests only to earn a few dollars/pounds/euros...& Sometimes, we overdo it!!
At a restaurant, there were too many foriegners & the owner overlooked us completely! When he didn't even offer us water for quite some time, my father called & asked him whether they serve only beer & coke & no water... He then said "Oh..You didnt tell us whether you want mineral or plain water!"
At another place, a couple of French men & women were smoking & causing immense nuisance to my already choked nasal tract. On request, they put it off but when the waiter was asked if it's a no smoking zone, he said, "Its perfectly Ok...You can smoke at the other table!" My parents again taught them the country's moral basics...the fact that smoking is banned in public places in India. :-)
Most interestingly, for the stolen & assorted Kohinoor, now in British Museum is portrayed as a gift from an Indian king while the guides to foriegn tourists, even from the Consulates are not supposed to say that all the precious & beautiful stones in Tajmahal have been brutally taken away by The British... (As they only confirmed that history has it)
Save the country, my friends!!
The overwhelming sentiments at the Delhi airport while we were waiting for our return flights, (again the departure time of the 2 flights were same), was even greater than in the former case. The snobs of Delhi (Don't take this to personally, they indeed were snobs!) thought we were meeting for the last time. All of us didn't know when we would meet together again! We have only met in groups of 2 & 3 in the last 1 year......
Pics are still in the memory of our fondly bought, new digital camera :-)

Trip to North Bengal...May 2006

This time, I had been off to the hills!!! To parts of northern west Bengal...WB is though the state that I originally belong to but have hardly stayed there! Destiny had it that my mother is posted at an odd location called Binnaguri (has Asia's largest military cantonment, which in turn has more wild tigers & elephants than men & women..;-) )since last 3 years!

I flew down to Kolkata on the 29th of April (my first flight alone & the ticket was from my pocket!!! Though am hoping to settle the LTA claims..;-D). Despite my prayers to have a handsome co-passenger, two old, unassuming men were my co-passengers L on the left & an absolute 'chikna' (I don't know the appropriate word in English!) male was the steward!! Two snobbish ladies chatting endlessly abt their hubby's health & wealth ever since they boarded the plane, were on my right!
(Though they sounded very rich & travel by air as much as I have ridden my bicycle, I still felt like telling them..."Try & earn once, u'll feel better!..:-)")

From there, me & my Dad (who came down from Bokaro..:-) took off for New Jalpaiguri, which is the gateway station to most places in the North East.

There, we met my beloved Mother as per our plan.
Then followed our journey into the hills! It was fabulous! Though I am not very good at writing travelogues & at appropriate descriptions of places & objects, but you can merrily assume the best of adjectives describing nature at its best for places like these!!

Our first destination was Kalimpong!
By the way, Northern west Bengal is primarily inhabited by the Nepalis & so is culturally very different from the rest of West Bengal!
Though I haven't been to Kerala, But I guess this is God's own country too!!!
The royal Himayalas which stand in the defence of our country at its northern borders are majestic!!! Thickly forested in a green that's pure & colours one soul!
(hum pe yeh kisne hara rang daala..;-))
Flowers in myriad hues..& I mean it!!! Kids must go there to learn all colours...everything except black!!! The combinations that nature can create, man can never can!!! & I can bet, they are better creations than elegant shopping malls & cinema halls! I would very soon, provide you with my illustrative evidences captured in my digicam! Again, I m just an amateur photographer but few photos are at par with best of PC wallpapers that we come across...
Roads uphill are not only beautiful but are a potential test to the skills of the driver! We traversed hairpin bends, S bends....(some had a radius of 35ft!)
Sometimes, it churns up all lipids, fluids & hormones inside us!!

The other destinations were Lava, Lolegaon, Rishap & Tinchley! The beauty of each of them is beyond the scope of my vocabulary as well as the length of my mail! Our tour was what they call as eco-tourism, wherein the owners of the lodge are as hospitable as our own people, tea is from the tea plantations behind the cottage, egg & chicken are from their own poultry, honey from their beehive, vegetables from their kitchen garden , fish from their fisheries etc.. Campfire in the evening warming it up by songs from Darjeeling to ones from Bob Dylan to papa kehte hain..:-)

Rishap, which is at an altitude of 8000ft, renders a spectacular sight of the Kanchenjunga! As artistic people put it, its 'mystic beauty' indeed..:-) Just that, it was beyond the range of my camera! One needs to trek up the extremely scary way to the cottages.
Tinchley is at 6000 ft & the entire place has been developed for tourists by WWF.

Pine forests accompanied us all through.
Lodging everywhere, was in wooden cottages. That was a welcome respite from the suffocating urban flats that we live in! Life in those places is simple but clean, peaceful, beautiful...

By the way, we met a Bangladeshi (obviously Bengali Muslims) family who were quite amicable & the young girls were a feast for the eyes for men of all age groups! Unfortunately, they don't get to wear those hype clothes back at home.

On our way back, we went to a place called Mongpu, where Rabindranath Tagore spent quite some time & hence that cottage is a memorial now! This gentleman's work is galactic! & One Bong, I guess, can't finish it all in a lifetime...& Ones like me cannot even decipher them! (am extremely regretful about it!) So just managed to get a few rare pics of his work, belongings & himself...:-)

Way downhill saw an increasing temperature! Though lush green surroundings are abundant in those areas even in the foothills/plains!

The more I travel, the more I feel, there's lot more to see, know & be in...
Unlike my Rajasthan trip in November, amidst forts & places, other beautiful man made creations & birdwatching, this trip was amidst God's best creations, flower & butterfly watching!

I now realize why we mugged a 1000 times in Social Science at School.."India is a land of diversity"...For every reason we can think of, India rocks now!!! All we lack is the awareness that we are the best!!! (Am trying hard to generate revenues in dollars, for my land by working for the foreign clients!)
If I ever get a chance to go abroad, I would make sure that I leave marks permanent enough for them to respect Indians & know India!
(if you have read my mail about the Rajasthan trip, you would know what I am talking about!)

The 2nd week of my planned Earn leave was spent at Kolkata with Ma, at a place that's formally our residence, now turned into a fully equipped/furnished rest/guest house..:-)

On my journey back to this sleepless city, I was traveling by (Yours faithfully, Indian Railways) & had an interesting travel with a female from a 'not-so-nice' background in the opposite berth (not for any fault of her own) & a female from IIT kharagpur (Btech(mech)) on the berth above!..:-)

The mail below that I wrote as my experience in the floods in Mumbai on 26 July, 2005

So, for all who were waiting to here from me after the Mumbai floods, here's my story..
I too, just like everybody else, had always heard & seen about devastations in floods, earthquakes, tsunami, epidemics, blasts..but this time I was privileged & blessed enough to experience one such devastating flood & then LIVE to tell this tale!

My regular office hours is from 1:30 pm-10pm. & That day, that torrential & windy rainfall exactly coincided with the high tide (Please pool in your Geography!) in the sea between 2pm-4pm.
My boss, an extreme hypocrite, left office..When I called him up at 6, he had no option but to let me leave!
Then began my ordeal..the struggle for existence!
The Patni bus, which runs almost like an international flight takes me 45 mins usually from office to my place. That day,the rains had already rendered the roads & all other structures invisible upto almost 3 feet if not more...In between, an angry mob banged the door of the bus & threatened to puncture our tyre if not allowed to get inside..(as the trains, which is the lifeline of the city had already been suspended & buses too were running with difficulty owing to awful road conditions). We, the employees inside the bus, had then no option but to let them in..This felt almost like a hijack...
Finally in 2 & 1/2 hrs, I reached a place at least 5 kms or a little furthur from my place, where I had to get down.
Amidst heavy traffic, frantic crowd, muddy lanes & busy highways, when I reached a place 15 mins from my place (under normal conditions) & thought would somehow grope my way in the dark & reach my hostel in another 1/2 an hour.. But I had yet to witness & experience the
flood..
I was now all alone..It was pitch dark, water all around up to the chest, stranded vehicles, people struggling their way through & me stumbling over every rock & stone..It was 10:30 pm..I walked for another half an hour, & had to enter my colony called Tilaknagar, my hostel was still 12-13 mins far from me (under normal conditions)..Somebody, on my way had already warned that the water level is up to that of my neck or even higher...
He was a tall man, so I sheepishly asked him " Up to your neck??" He smiled & replied back "No, up to your neck!". I still sighed a relief! But being a solitary soul in this city,I had it in mind that I had to reach my hostel somehow coz owing to these conditions, I couldn't have now gone to anybody else's place & nobody had anticipated this severity ever.. Veterans in that area had never seen it before..!
I just took a turn towards tilaknagar & guess what.. The enormous & forceful ('mighty' is the word to describe them) water waves threw my down completely & I was flowing along.. I didn't know whom to recall last..;-)
In the flick of a second, I felt a rescuing force vertically upward & I could breathe outside water! He was a god's messenger, 6'2" in height & I must say, quite well-built..he pulled me by my sleeve alone!
In the meantime,I saw 2 females floating towards me who had attempted to go a little further.
I then was very sure that I wudn't reach hostel that night..Well, night-stand!!..;-) but where???
There's a Shoppers' Stop closeby, which we took another 15 mins to reach, wading through neck-deep water..& Finally we sought rescue at the 5 visible steps of shoppers' stop, 2 of which drowned over the night..Since I was already wet from head to toe, my mobile & every bit of item in my handbag was afloat..I had nothing to protect from water..Networks were jammed, mobiles were not working & no force on earth could improve our situation. I placed myself comfortably & watched people wading through water destined to other places, which were more viable. A Maruti 800 car got completely submerged over the night & only the roof was visible. Over the night, other people going towards Tilaknagar had to take refuge here..& They had no option but to enjoy my company..:-)
The fun began now..!
Since cars were submerged, owing to pressures & censors headlights started blinking..(only source of light at that time).
On my way, I had rested my hand on a Tata Indica for a few minutes & it floated away! I felt so strong that I could move the car with one hand!

There was a female who started crying that her parents would be awake all night. I rebuked & said "That's why I sent across wrong messages to my parents last evening. It's already raining enough :-)"
There was another female who said "I'll call my brother, he'll take me from here. I can't sit here all night". I looked at her with the corner of my eye & thought to myself, "If he can rescue us tonight, I'll tie him rakhi too! (which I've never done in my life so far & don't intend to do so ever)"
Then came a group of 4 rowdy but energetic boys who stood on top of the Maruti car & began performing 'Bhangra'..& dived into the pool of water in turns & competed for their swimming skills..! Ohh..What a sight it was..! Though others were complaining a lot, I was enjoying that thoroughly..:-)
Then came a couple..As is the case, the female was a namby-pamby type & couldn't bear the cold..(the guy had to leave his bike on some distant highway). I told her "why did u come so late, the 'chaay-wala' just left!"
I also took a nap in that horrible condition! (You ought to commend my anytime-anywhere sleeping abilities)
By 6 in the morning, our back & limbs were giving up, the intensity of rain was much less, the maruti's windows were visible & everybody gathered guts unanimously to make a move towards Tilaknagar.. Implementing Ringa-Ringa roses & 'kadam-kadam badhaye ja' fully, we waded through the water inch by inch..Though I was numb already, I was shivering involuntarily in the ice-cold water ,still up to a level little lower than the neck.. those relatively weak females held my arms so tight that they are still aching (apart from the war I had waged against water last night!). The water undercurrents still tended to draw us apart..but we realised very well that 'United we stand, divided we fall'..& I kept telling my cycling basics to them.."Keep peddling. Move your legs up & forward. Dont stand still". In 1 & 1/2 hrs, (that usual 12 mins distance), I reached my hostel & found the ground floor submerged (Thankfully only the office & mess lies there)! The mess workers did a yeoman's job by supplying us food for both meals even in that crisis. They had shifted parts of their apparatus to 1st floor.
My feet's flesh was looking like rotten flesh..! I somehow gathered strength to clean myself & A few girls who hadn't moved last day said "Go, hurry up & change..U'll catch cold!" Was anything remaining!..:-)
But the stories that I heard since last 2 days were terrifying..

A female stayed in a submerged train all night, with her legs in water!(Good sauna..!)
Another woman had already sought forgiveness from all her near & dear ones for this lifetime, when she saw Tata Sumos flowing, buffaloes flowing, Walls breaking, trees uprooting & people already dying! As is evident, ground floors of many houses were afloat..Selfishly though, I felt lucky not to have my house there!
People walked down from one end of Bombay to the other for hours together. The highest I've heard so far is 6 hours! (Not to forget, they were walking in water!)
Many people stayed back in their offices for that night & somehow made it the next day morning. Some people went on their way to heaven through manholes underground & other such things as is common in the news.
While sitting at those steps outside Shoppers' stop all night, the person I was missing most is Barkha Dutt! I thought if she could withstand the firing at Kargil, she could withstand this too. I'll never be as brave as her but I really feel like sending this mail to her too..(barkha.dutt@ndtv.com
??? ;-))
Since there was no electricity for 2 days, everyone's mobile's battery discharged & I still had no communication with my parents or even my sister, who also survived the floods in this city & whose status, was worrying me beyond description. (I hope none of you will ask me, why didn't you go to a telephone booth!). It took 36 hrs for the water to subside completely & it'll take a couple of days more for normal functioning of this city.
But I appreciate the energy & attitude of the people of the Business capital wherein, the transport (road & rail) were restored immediately after the water level subsided; people started moving to offices or their respective destinations in flocks, as if nothing had happened. Today, in my office, people are hardly wasting time discussing the tragedy. Everybody passes a smile meaning "good to see u back!"
I had tried sending messages through other people & finally I could talk to my parents with a wonderful piece of lie that I had reached my hostel in time & without much hassle! What's the whole point in taking their sleep away, after all I'm an adult! now!
By the way, My cell phone is working fine but the display's spoilt, cant see anything on the screen so could receive calls.. Now, it is with Nokia priority dealer, maybe for the next one week.

For the very short time, that I had charged the battery from an external source yesterday & had the phone with me, I received calls from people whom I was hearing from, for the 1st or 2nd time after birth! It really feels good when people seem so concerned about you & One of the unfortunate calls were from my Boss, who had called up to check if I'm alive so that he could employ an alternative resource immediately for my 'single resource, mission critical project' in case I were...!
Anyway, the experience was tough but worth it & my belief that the number of good people in this world are higher got affirmed.

Grow up Baby!!!

If I can, anybody can... This is something I have felt and said several times over. Sounds Modest??? Maybe yes, maybe not! Sounds assertive??? Certainly yes... If it doesn't, I intend it to be so. Plainly because I am not talking about any difficult things in life. I believe firmly that every individual by virtue of 16-18 years of training and education, should 'at least' learn to manage one ownself. Though I am not trained to preach on this subject but my repeated observations have confirmed my convictions.

Can anyone tell me why working women essentially need a father or husband to manage their savings, investments etc? I think it's a simpler job to save and invest than to earn. If they are educated enough to learn the latter, they might as well be taught the former. Most women, when it comes to taking key decisions in their lives like change in job, change in location, travelling somewhere will have to depend on a MAAAAN! Ah..if they can go out & buy clothes & shoes for themselves, they might as well decide the more important things. Not that I haven't met women who are independent in every sense of the word... but atleast, the Indian way of training women does not support this mental accomplishment that I am talking about.

Even the fact that women are not allowed to go out alone in unsafe places or at odd hours, travel alone etc... is rather discouraging. When a girl is sent out for studies or for work, it's implied that they are confronting everything outside home..people, places, objects! And they could be secure or insecure for them. So, I insist that they better be taught how to defend themselves in adverse situations and apply their minds to sustain their lives outside home rather than disabling them with a male escort all their lives.

Funnily enough, some women can't even buy their own 'critical' garments and accesories! [I hope you got it! I didn't want to use that term here. I am keen to convey the message than make it a piece of slapstick humour]. "Mummy-papa khareed layenge!" {"kyon behen? ;-) apni chheezein khareedne me kaun si sharam?!!"}

Coming over to the more physically powerful gender, I have noticed some men with ... habits. [I really don't have words to qualify this habit] Why on earth can they not wash their 'critical' garments themselves? To some of you, it might appear wry or sarcastic but I really mean it. Why should women, in any capacity, (mother or wife) bear the brunt of smelling and touching those apparels that have adorned the key parts of his mortal self? I simply refuse to accept any justification/argument for the same. :-( Some can't even or can, but would not iron their own clothes. Paid and getting it done is fine but otherwise, I feel it's so crude and offensive for the one who does it. Men expecting women to serve food on the table as soon as they come back from work, or needing a wife or a mother to find out their clothes when they are getting late for office, college... The root of all these problems are the same! Lack of training as an individual! I have even heard men accepting the fact that they can cook well but they want a wife in the house to take care of his food requirements! For them, I'd like to say it's available paid..It's unfair to get it done for free!

There are many more such examples but I would like the message to be stronger than the humour in the stories. And, I would sincerely beg to differ with those who misconstrue it as a feminism/chauvinism issue! It's certainly an individualism issue... That's why I gave examples of both genders to elucidate my point of view.

Also, some people might say that in few of these examples that I gave, love/affection/warmth/blah...blah does play a role. I wouldn't deny either..But seeking help/advice/pampering oneself for some time is one thing and taking things for granted on a daily basis is another! Clearly, I object the later!

I always feel that when you are taught how to live, you should be taught all aspects of it that is essential for you to live and that too, very clearly. Unfortunately, I have met some people who refute the issue saying that what's the harm if someone who's free or is willing can do it for them and doesn't forcibly get it done. For them, I'd say learn to value other's efforts and time as much as you do yours! Taking help/advice is one thing and never learning to do something for all your life, is like being handicapped!

Well now that you have had eough of my gyaan, post your comments :-) Remember not to get into anyone's personal space and talk about it as a subject in general.